Simple Steps to Happiness...

I recently read an article in which the author concluded that happiness seems to be the goal of all other goals, and that people seek happiness in very roundabout ways. Well duh, why didn't I ever think of that? We go about our daily lives giving in to temptations, working certain jobs, talking to various people, dating, exercising, and making so many other decisions we don't even think about.  For many of us, if we sat down and asked ourselves why we do all of those things, and make the decisions we make, I guarantee most of us would say it's because deep down it makes us happy. 

Isn't that what life is all about?  Being happy?!  What is the point of being miserable and worrying about the little things that ultimately do not matter?  Life is too short to not be happy.  Do what makes YOU happy.  If you haven't found your happiness yet, find it and make it happen.  After all, when it comes down to it, the only person who can make you 100% happy is YOU!  This is your one life; make the best of it.  Don't worry about what others are doing or what others have, worry about you and your happiness.  Once you find that, everything will start to fall into place. 


Here are a few things I have recently learned that have helped me with my happiness...

1.) Always find time to smile and laugh, and don't take everything so serious.


2.) Set aside 5 minutes after you wake up in order to plan your day.  Don't get lost in the hustle-bustle of life from the get-go.  Wake up with a positive attitude and remind yourself that this is your day, and that you should make the best of it and every situation that comes out of it.  Yes, there will be little speed bumps, but handle them with care and realize they are just little hiccups and they don't last very long.

3.) Be silly.

4.) Write down a few affirmations that you can recite and read daily.  Here are a few of mine that I just started:

Personal Power & Success:
-Every adversity, every failure, and every heartache carries with it the seed of an equivalent or greater benefit.
-I am transparent. What you see is what you get, and I love that about myself.
Body & Health:
-I love myself and deserve a healthy body.
-I don't need fat anymore. I am strong.
Love & Relationships:
-I let go of the idea that I can somehow mold people or situations to my liking.
-I surround myself with authentic and loving people who share my journey of personal growth and awakening.
-I feel safe and secure.  I let go of the need for others' approval.  I stand up for myself.
Career & Work:
-My life purpose can be whatever I decide to make it.
-I choose to live a worry-free life because I know that anxiety crowds out productivity.
-By being myself and doing what I love, I make a significant contribution to life.
Transformation:
-Every forward step I have made in my life gives me complete confidence in myself.  I take the time to appreciate how far I've come. 
Joyful Living:
-I am happy where I am and I am eager for more.
-When I feel that it's all too much to handle, I lighten up and remind myself that I don't have to be perfect.
-Everything is getting better every day.


I want to end with a quote that really hit close to home for me and put everything into perspective.  I hope this quote can help others the way it has opened my eyes and helped me.

"If you look to others for fulfillment, you will never truly be fulfilled.  If your happiness depends on money, you will never be happy with yourself.  Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are.  When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you."

-Lao Tzu 

I am Reborn!

"You gain STRENGTH, COURAGE, and CONFIDENCE by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, "I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along." Eleanor Roosevelt

Until recently I was never able to look fear in the face. I did not have strength, courage, or confidence. I would always give in to fear, insecurity, doubt, depression, food, and so much more.  I was always giving in and doing what I thought others wanted me to do. Focusing so much on what other people thought consumed much of my life. I was so insecure, unhappy, and sad on the inside, but I had to put on a smile in order to make family and friends believe I was happy. I wanted so badly for that faux smile to be a real smile.

Here is a little background info for you:  I have been involved in sports my whole life. I was a three sport athlete in high school and continued to play soccer at a D-I college.  Because of this, I always "maintained" a decent weight, but it was never good enough and it was never where I wanted to be. I always felt short and stubby. Throughout my life, I've had minor run-ins with eating disorders, but never anything serious enough to do anything about.  This cycle continued until two years ago when I decided I was sick of not being happy and decided to take my body to the next level. I foolishly decided to compete in a figure competition.  I say "foolishly" because it did not have the affect I had hoped for; it actually backfired on me.

I competed in two competitions, and I felt amazing. I was lean, and I felt pretty and feminine.  Not feeling feminine had also been a huge challenge for me.  All I ever wanted was to feel beautiful and feminine, and up until I stepped on that stage, I had never experienced that feeling. I placed 2nd to a woman who was already a pro, which qualified me for pro status. I was on cloud 9. But the entire process was grueling, and a week after I stepped off that stage I blew up like a balloon and was even worse off than before I started training for the competition. I kept telling myself I was going to train again and I was going to get back to the way I was, but I failed every time. I was a mess, both mentally and physically. I just couldn't get to where I wanted to be.

After my competitions I worked out at your every day gym, but I was still having the hardest time staying on track, and I definitely wasn't eating the way I should. I was so frustrated, pissed off, and sick of busting my ass. I didn't know what to do, and walked around like a complete idiot feeling hopeless. My depression was so bad I hated seeing people because I didn't want them to talk about how fat I had become and how I was once an athlete and figure competitor.  I think in some ways that is why I decided to move out of my small town. It sucked, I hated life, and no one really knew how I felt inside because I always felt I had to appear happy, strong and confident.

Then finally my breakthrough came in the form of CrossFit Round Rock! I walked in thar door 3 1/2 months ago and will never be the same. Not only are the workouts bad ass, challenging, amazing, and awesome, I have met so many wonderful people. CFRR is not just a gym, or just a box, or just CrossFit; CFRR is a family and everyone there strives to help make you the best person you can be. I have been empowered by the women at CFRR and I can finally say I am happy with not only who I am, but the way I look. I won't lie to you or myself and say every day is perfect, but I will say I have never, ever, ever been as happy as I am today with myself and who I am becoming.


The moral of this long story is THIS:  find something worth fighting for, find your happiness, and look fear in the face and laugh at it. Don't just sit around and wait for it to happen. Be able to have STRENGTH, COURAGE, and CONFIDENCE. Once you find your happiness, hold onto it, don't let it go, and continue to work at it. Life is too short and we have to make the best of it and live it to the fullest. I have fallen several times, but I got back up every time and finally this time I am standing my ground.  Will you???

Who am I?!

The thought of blogging terrifies me but it's just another step in the right direction for my life.  You might be asking yourself, "who in the heck is Melanie Joy and why would I want to follow her blog?"  That is a good question.  I am me, I am a normal, average woman.  I am not a well-known actress, I am not a pro-athlete, I am me!  I don't claim to know everything, but I have had my share of ups and downs and I am here to let you know that you are not alone.   I am here to share my world with you.  I am here to be real, vulnerable, open and honest.  I am here for you and I am here for me.